Rejection, it is a word we’re all familiar with. It is a word we all probably run from physically as well as literally when we read it off a page or screen. It holds great power over us in the way that it keeps us at bay, it keeps us in our place whether we like where we are in life or not.
You may be mustering all the courage in the world to finally ask the girl of your dreams out. Over the weeks or months the anxiety has been running you ragged at the thought of her saying ‘no thanks’ or worse, laugh at you! no, she wouldn’t do that, bite the bullet and try your luck!
You may be going over in your mind that it’s time to ask for a promotion. Your years of work certainly warrants it, and you are the only employee that really fits the bill. But again, the dreaded ‘no’ hovers over you like a black cloud.
You might be ready to take the plunge into purchasing your first investment property. You’ve done so much homework these past few years and know that the next step is action. But you have little to no money and fear that even though your serviceability will not be an issue, who will lend you the money? There will quite possibly be more than one ‘no’s’ coming your way!
Taking stock of the inevitable
All of the above mentioned scenarios can and will happen to you if you put yourself in those positions and ask the question. But you know something? It’s going to be okay.
The moment you receive that ‘no’ you will not spontaneously combust, nor will the world laugh at you and place billboards around the town to forever remind them of your world ending failure. The moment will instead pass like any other moment in time before it. You will lose the anxiety, you will lose the lump in your throat, and you will now finally have an answer. Granted, it won’t be the one you were hoping for, but you now know one more thing than you knew the moment before you asked.
It’s at this moment that we can now move on. Move on to another girl, or take a break from the potential dating game. Move on from the idea of promotion and maybe look at a career change. Move on from that lending firm and find another.
It’s time to upgrade yourself!
Burning is learning
You’ve been burnt. But like a tree in the forest, you rise from the ashes and grow even bolder and greener than before. Sure, it will take some time to get to this stage in life, but you’ve been released from the shackles of anxiety and now have freedom to learn.
Hit the books and begin to read on relationships and attraction. You might discover a tip like: Put yourself first and make yourself happy rather than trying to impress a desired lover and trying to do things you THINK will make them happy.
Start surrounding yourself with mentors or at least one mentor. Someone who you see in the community as a person you would like to be in the future. Or a person who you see as having exceptional morals and would love to develop said virtues.
Listen to podcasts as you walk or drive and find some good financial expert subscriptions. There are plenty out there if you type in key words of your desired topic!
It’s processes like these that you can start right now simply by taking little steps. One book, one associate or one podcast away from beginning to upgrade your desired field of interest.
Becoming the person you want to be…
Upgrading yourself does not have to be in just one field. It can be in every single facet of your life! It may seem like an overwhelming statement, and you are right…If you let it stay that way.
But let’s break things down into intricate parts where you can start upgrading your life;
- Brush your teeth at least twice a day instead of once.
- Eat another cup of vegetables a day from what you are now.
- Walk and extra 1000 steps everyday from now on.
- Say hello to someone you haven’t in the past at least once each day.
- Say thankyou a little more often.
- Think of one thing you’re grateful for each day.
- Tell your partner you appreciate them the next time they do that 1 percenter for you.
- Express your gratitude to your boss next time they are understanding towards a request from you.
- Read 5 more pages than you currently are of a book each day.
- Do 2 minutes of stretching a day.
- Take a few minutes of your day to close your eyes and breathe.
All these things might seem small and mostly unrelated to everything mentioned before. But if you start at least one of them now and commit to it, you’ll very soon notice that they are all momentum starters into being more productive.
The idea of beginning these little habits is that they are gateways into you increasing your self care input. And when you increase your self care you start to love yourself more. You start to get hungry for more growth as well. You’ll find yourself wanting to read more, converse more, exercise and eat nutritiously more.
Through rejection we clear the deadwood of our anxious minds. Through rejection we find a path we had not seen before. Through rejection we have room to grow out from our previous self. It is not comfortable being rejected, but if you can start to condition yourself into accepting rejection as a form of growth, you’ll certainly begin creating a path of great tolerance and wisdom.
Use your next rejection as a call to arms for upgrading yourself.
For this weeks closing thoughts, I have for you a quote that I find absolutely motivating every time I read it!
Decide how the person you want to become would act and then act that way – even when it’s really fucking hard.Tom Bilyeu
Self awareness is progression